Missing Out

If I’d been asked two months ago as we drove home from Las Vegas, I would have predicted this to be a long summer for baseball. That is, long as in one that drags on, not long due to playoff success. Despite the rocky start, our Inland Empire Golden Bears ended the season at the top of the North Division of the Western Baseball Association, and they accepted a bid to the National Baseball Congress World Series. Now they are en route to Wichita, Kansas.

I am not. I have six days left of teaching summer classes, and I already took a week-long vacation this semester. (Really?! The one summer I teach summer school?!) This means I am a.) without my husband for an uncertain period of time, and b.) missing the most exciting coaching opportunity my husband has had since I met him. The tournament is double-elimination, so when I will see my husband again depends on how well his team plays. If they lose the first two games, we will be apart about one week, and each game they win will extend that time.

As a coach’s wife, I strive to be involved, to be there to support my husband and his team through each win and loss, however big or small. But missing this is hard. Of course, I want them to win. I want my husband to succeed, but I hate that I have to miss that success. Selfishly, it is easier on me if they lose: I’ll have my husband home sooner, and I’ll know I haven’t missed as much. But it’s better for my husband if his team wins, and what is good for my husband is good for me as well.

If they do well enough, I will be in Wichita for the championship week of the tournament, and I will get to see the team win it all, so that is what I must hope for even if it does mean I spend two weeks away from my husband.

I’m learning to accept that no matter how hard I try to be a part of my husband’s world, I have some responsibilities of my own, and I’ll have to miss out on events—even big events—from time to time. Missing out is just as much a part of the coach’s wife life as fitting in. I just have to remember that even in his tenth year, my husband is still early in his career, and there will be many more big moments for me to experience and celebrate with him.

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2 thoughts on “Missing Out

  1. I was in the same boat for our regional playoffs this year! The game was in the middle of the week – three hours away from home. We have a 2 1/2 year old and I had to work the next morning, so getting home at 2 am wasn’t an option. The team beat tremendous odds and won the game to take them to the state tournament. I followed at home glued to my twitter feed and refreshing every second to see if the radio station had posted the next play-by-play update. But, celebrating what turned out to be one of my Coach’s career highlights at home, in the dark, with my cats, just wasn’t the same!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Pingback: Mrs. Coach Walk

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